


Merry Little Christmas

by bucky_barnes481



Category: Captain America (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types
Genre: Christmas Eve, Christmas Fluff, Implied/Referenced Suicide, Just to be safe there are some adult heavy topics mentioned, M/M, Prisoner of War, happy endings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-06
Updated: 2017-12-06
Packaged: 2019-02-11 12:38:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12935442
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bucky_barnes481/pseuds/bucky_barnes481
Summary: I Want To Dry Your Tears AU  from the AUideas Advent Calender.This is from one of my own stories already on my page! Just an excerpt off of that that didn't quite fit the timeline of the story just yet. Basically, Steve and Bucky are two single dads who found each other after their children got in trouble at pre-school.





	Merry Little Christmas

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Take Me Home](https://archiveofourown.org/works/4761569) by [bucky_barnes481](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bucky_barnes481/pseuds/bucky_barnes481). 



> This is a speed writing and I'm sorry for any typos or anything that could be in there. I hope you like it! Just in case there is some PTSD issues inside and implied suicide

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the house only one creature wasn’t stirring and it wasn’t the mouse. Little Ian Rogers wasn’t feeling too good this Christmas Eve with his double ear infections. The poor little guy was cranky and clinging to his father for most of the night. It was a rough start to the day when this holiday was already hard. Considering that the little guy wanted his mommy, which they both knew was impossible. It left Steve feeling a little flustered in this whole mess. Which lead to him texting the one person that made sense through thing thing called life. Bucky Barnes. 

It was about twenty minutes before the man arrived his daughter in tow. The little girl had slowly become great friends with Ian ever since biting him the first day of preschool. Running inside she gave the boy a hug and promised not to leave his side. Somehow she had convinced her father that the family dog had to come as well. Scout was in his Christmas sweater where he lovingly laid down behind the kids and kept a watchful eye on the two. They were his kids after all, and despite painting him rainbow once he still kept watch over them. It made the older men in the room smile briefly. 

Bucky took it upon himself to get things sorted. It was hectic to get everything going and running smoothly. Of course there were hiccups in the whole thing. Ian wanting his mother, Steve looking stressed beyond belief, and wrapping paper everywhere in the bedroom. It was a right mess alright. 

Bucky finally got his daughter tucked into bed despite her excitement of Santa. He had to tell her that if she didn’t sleep that Santa wouldn’t come. In the bed on the other side of the room was a sleeping Ian, having crashed right after dinner in Steve’s arms. Kissing Sarah on the head he turned on the nightlight and closed the door. It was a battle to get her in bed but he hoped that getting her in bed now with the threat of Santa not coming would keep her there. There was a man in the living room that needed him right now. The man with the haunted blue eyes again. He hadn’t seen those eyes since they started dating. 

Heading out he went into the main area. There was Steve looking at the nicely decorated tree with a picture in his hand. The blue eyes stained with tears that fell down his cheeks. The one armed soldier made his way over to him on the couch. He flopped down beside him, before pulling him to lean on him. Today wouldn’t have happened if Steve hadn’t texted him asking to come over. It was a heavy day in the Roger’s household. Of course Bucky understood why. Ian was sick and wanting his mother. The mother in the picture Steve was holding onto. The haunted eyes existed in the picture too, something Bucky hadn’t noticed before now. Of course they weren’t as lifeless as the ones he was looking into now. Losing Peggy had been the final nail in the coffin for the former pilot. 

“I thought it would be easier the longer we were without her.” the soft voice of Steve broke out. It caught in his throat for a moment. Bucky just pulled him closer, petting the blond hair. “Winter is just hard all around though I guess.”

Bucky nodded a little. “I get part of that. I lost my mother on Christmas when I was twenty-one. She had cancer, it just spread like wildfire all over her.” The blonde looked up at Bucky, allowing him to wipe the tears from his eyes. “It gets a bit better after you lose someone but it takes a long while.” 

Steve gave a little nod. “Christmas was Peggy’s thing. She took care of it all after...well after.” he sighed a little. Bucky wasn’t going to pry but he was sure it had to do with the scars that littered the man’s chest and the jagged one around his heart. 

There was a long pause where neither man said anything. Bucky just kept his hand running through Steve’s hair. What was he supposed to say? Sorry? Bucky hated when people said that after someone died. What else do you say though? Death was a terrible and hard thing but it didn’t matter in the long run. Sorry didn’t fix things. Sorry didn’t bring them back from the dead. It never did and it never would. Perhaps it would just be easier to say that they were there for whatever the person needed. Bucky was lucky to have his fellow soldiers to help him and his ex-wife. 

“Buck, why do those coordinates over your heart go to a grave? You said they were home.” Steve broke the silence. 

“Did you read who the grave belonged to?” With the shake of the head Bucky sighed. “That is my mom’s grave. She was always my home. No matter where we were or who was around she was home. Always will be. When cancer took her it was a hard blow.” 

“Sounds like my mother. She made everywhere feel like home too.” He gave a faint smile. “Alright I guess I owe you a free question after digging into your past without asking.” 

Bucky looked at him. “Winter is hard because of that scar too isn’t it? The one on your chest around your heart.” There now it was in the open. He hadn’t asked what happened but he had to know what it was about. If it had to do with how the man was feeling right now during winter. They had known each other for nearly three years now and he just had to know. 

Steve paused and gave a nod. “Well I did say you had a free question.” He put the picture down and put his hand on the scar. “It has a lot to do with why I don’t like winter. Peggy passing was what solidified it but this came first.” He took Bucky’s flesh and blood hand and put it on the scar. The raised bump was clear from where his fingers rested over the shirt. “I was a prisoner of war. My unit was captured and as it stands it is me and one other man left standing. The others were either killed there or died over here because they couldn’t handle it.” Bucky nodded. He understood how that was. He had lost many friends over the years to a war that no one saw. The war was not fought on a battlefield with bullets raining down on them. It was fought at home and often he saw the result being death. “I refused to tell those who captured us anything. They took it upon themselves to make us talk. If it wasn’t for Sam I wouldn’t be here. They were going to kill me and slowly. They started to cut away at my chest. The scar left was where they would have gotten to my heart. Sam got free and saved my ass. Since then the PTSD of being shot down, captured, tortured, and all it gets worse during the winter. The scar hurts more. Then Peggy after she got cancer it just got worse.” 

Bucky listened, his free hand running through Steve’s hair. “Well if they are the same people that blew my arm off, then I hope that they got what was coming to them.” Steve sat up and nodded. “Cancer sucks though. It sucks because you can’t do anything about it.” Bucky stood up and gave a small smile towards Steve. “I don’t know about you but my family we always opened one gift on Christmas eve. I think you need that gift.” 

“Buck, it’s okay, you being here helps.” 

Bucky didn’t stop though. He went to the three and plucked a gift from under it. His gift. A small box. Putting it in Steve’s hand he sat down beside him. “Merry Christmas Steve.” 

Steve tore at the wrapping paper, giving pause at the small box. He had an idea of what was going on but kept going. He opened the box to see a dog tag, behind it a ring. Looking over it all he pulled the ring and tag out of the box. The tag was one of Bucky’s tags. He turned to look at the other who was now kneeling in front of him. “Buck…” 

“I asked Ian if he would like two dads about two months ago. He said yes. I asked Sarah the same thing. She said yes. I knew about you being a P.O.W for a while, didn’t know that is what they did.” He took his hand in his. The old clock chimed indicating it was now midnight. “Will you marry me Steve? I want to be here through all the bad days and I hope I can give some light to this season.” 

Steve moved the box out of the way, before he slid off the couch and kissed the other. Bucky smiled into it holding onto him. “Yes. I love you James. Thank you.” Steve finally answered him. 

“Merry Christmas Steven.” He smiled brightly at him. He took the tag and ring off the table before sliding it onto Steve’s neck. “I love you too.”


End file.
